The (Sometimes) Elusive Female Orgasm

November 29, 2009

There is a real range when it comes to women having orgasms. There is a likely biological difference between women (though exactly what that might be is not known). Some women have a lower threshold for orgasm and other women a higher threshold. This reflects differences in sensitivity.

There is a big psychological difference between women in that some women are less uninhibited than others and can let themselves go without guilt or shame and this makes it easier for them to have an orgasm. Anxiety interferes both psychologically and biologically (in the brain by blocking certain neural pathways) with reaching a climax. Lastly there are differences in education levels about the body and sex. Some women simply know a lot more about how to have an orgasm than others. Read the rest of this entry »


To Fake Or Not To Fake?

November 23, 2009

Below are some tips on what you can do if you have been faking orgasms in your relationship and now want to come clean and go for the real thing.

Most women have sometime in their sexual lives faked an orgasm. Not only that but they also have likely faked being aroused in the first place, or possibly faked experiencing what their partner is doing as feeling good. There are many reasons women fake it. Most women will tell you it is to please their partner. Women feel tremendous pressure to preserve their partner’s ego and fear he will be crushed if they don’t appear to orgasm. Women also think that in order to hold onto their man (keep him from finding a more satisfying partner) they have to appear very hot in bed which they believe translates into having an orgasm all the time. Some women fake it for other reasons. Many women are self conscious about the amount of time it takes them to climax. Rather than being uninhibited about how long, how much stimulation and what kind they need, a woman may chose to just fake it and not have to “expose” her needs to her partner. There is also a group of women who really don’t know how to have an orgasm. They feel very inhibited and have not been able to explore what works for them, let alone tell or show a partner how to help them climax. This group will often fake orgasms to avoid revealing what feels like a “defect” in their body or sexuality. Read the rest of this entry »